Ride or push?

I was very thankful when the riding lawn mower cranked today. It hasn't worked very well, but after mowing most of the summer with the push mower, the riding mower is a life saver! As I was finishing up, I got to thinking about what a difference it makes-pushing or riding. Riding along while the mower does all the work is a breeze. All I have to do is dodge a few limbs here and there and steer, which is really not work at all. As I compared it to push mowing, I found myself relating it to our walk sometimes with the Lord. It is easy to sit on the pew, take in a sermon, turn on KLove, maybe read some devotion and ride along on the message someone else has from the Lord. They do all the work, and we just coast by, taking in the scenery.

Push mowing is hard work, especially as hot as it and and as big as the yard is! The push mower can get around the poles, ditches and flower beds much better than the riding mower. That really convicted me when I saw that I need to not only hear the sermon, the devotion, etc, but then get in there and do the harder thing by digging in deep myself. I need to see what the Lord is telling me, not just hearing it maybe 3 times a week at church, but everyday.

I have to be honest here; it is so much easier to ride by and even though there are many times where God has used a devotion, a pastor, a song, to speak to me, I still need that one on one time with Him and that has always been a struggle for me.

In fact, just this past week, I came in to school having had a bad morning and told someone if they have a good devotion, to send it my way because I needed it that day. If only I had gotten up a little earlier to open the word on my own, maybe God would have had just the words to say to me that day. Instead I relied on someone else, and that is not how He always needs to speak to us.

I wasn't too hot, really, when I was riding the lawn mower; but when I got off and started pushing and actually having to apply myself and use my own energy to get the job done, boy did I work up a thirst!! Water had never tasted so good!

I think it is the same with Him- when we really start seeking Him and spending that time with Him, it makes us thirsty for more of Him.

I hope I find myself pushing more in my walk and learning from the ride when the other mower cranks as well.

"Son"flowers

On the way to school today, I passed by the Farmer's Market, and saw a bright, bouquet of sunflowers. If I had not been running behind, I would have stopped by and bought some. (Although, I paid a whopping $7 for a watermelon for Presley this summer at a fruit stand, so flowers might run a little higher!)

I couldn't help but think of Pruitt as I passed by. Here is why: two nights before he passed away, I was sitting in the rocking chair by his crib, around midnight, and the Lord gave me a poem. I have said that I love to write but really feel that I have to be "inspired." Well, I was. The words flowed, and it was almost like I couldn't get them down fast enough. I had been thinking of nursery rhymes, and the Itsy Bitsy Spider was on my mind. I had heard of a book called Down Came the Rain by Brooke Shields and her battle with post-pardum depression. I guess that was still in my mind......So anyway, I wrote the following poem. I know for sure that it was from the Lord, and I think even though it was true then, it means more to me now.

Out Came the Son

There is a little nursery rhyme, we all know very well, about a tiny spider, his story we can tell. But this is our story, one of joy and pain, and how, just like the spider, we'll go up the spout again. See, for so long the rain poured and mixed in with the tears,

The storm raged all around us, bringing questions, doubts and fears. Yet even in the midst of night, when the clouds turned gray, the Son's light fell on us- His mercies were new each day. He gave us hope, He gave us peace. We were strengthened in our faith. How we made it through the trials was only by His grace. At times we thought the rain wouldn't end, then glimpse we'd get, of a ray of "Son"shine to remind us He wasn't done yet. The flowers grew because of the rain, the grass grew green and tall. Miracles came that some had said would never come at all. Through the storm we learned some things to get us through each day, and just in time, out came the Son, and dried our tears away. So when you sing a little rhyme of a spider and a spout, remember that though the rain may fall, the Son always comes back out.

I had checked on Pruitt at 5am that Sunday morning, August 21, and when I went back in at 7 he had gone to be with Jesus. I like to think that just maybe it was around sun-up, when the Son came to take him home. That would just seem like something the Lord would do.

Jason's aunt had sent us journals to write in during those days after Pruitt was born. On the cover of one of them was this verse: "He is like the light of morning at sunrise on a cloudless morning, like the brightness after rain that brings grass from the earth." 2 Samuel 23:4

We took sunflowers to the cemetery on Pruitt's birthday, and like I said before, I like to think of them as "Sonflowers." Maybe I'll stop and buy some tomorrow.

Laci

There's so much to our Pruitt story, and I'd like to put it all on here. However, this post will be out of order of things. Five years ago tonight, around 10 o'clock, to be exact, we were getting settled in a hospital room off of the NICU. We were told we had to feel comfortable enough with all the tubes, oxygen and feedings in order to bring Pruitt home. We got in our room and were getting settled before they brought Pruitt in to us, when a nurse came in with a peculiar look on her face. At first I thought something was wrong, and she began to speak. She asked did we know that there had been another baby born in the recent months with the same condition as Pruitt. We did. She asked did we know that he had passed away. We did, only because the hospice worker on that case went to our church and had told us. The she asked us, did we know that he had been in the same "pod," in the same bed space as Pruitt was. We did not know this. I got an eerie feeling when she said that, and then she added, "That baby's mother is here and was wanting to meet you." I was blown away, wondering why in the world she would be there at 10:00pm on a Sunday night. We agreed to the meeting and I sat down waiting for the encounter. A few minutes later, in walked a beautiful blonde girl who I immediately felt a connection with. We sat and talked for at least an hour. As we talked, I found out that she was a nurse tech on a completely different floor. She had not been back to work since her baby, Dalton, had passed away about a month earlier. That night, they needed someone to float up to the NICU and asked her, knowing how difficult that would be. As she approached the "pod" that Dalton had been in and at that very moment, Pruitt was in, she later told me that the nurses tried to keep her away, because of the situations being the same. They knew how hard that would be for her. She insisted on meeting Pruitt, and they then told her we were there.

The next day, I recall telling the events of the night to Jason's mom and how surreal they were. I know Laci felt a need to be able to help us, for she had already walked the road that we were walking; however, I too came away with a feeling of wanting to help her as well.

A friendship formed that night because of a divine appointment that the Lord set up. I believe that with all my heart. It's one thing to be able to say to someone you know how they feel, but she and I really know how the other feels. We saw the exact same doctors! We walked the same path, for the most part. I know God puts people in our lives just when we need them, and I know He did that for me and Laci.